copyright August 4, 1998

Geo T ("Bastardo") and Dave ("Guido") show an eerie level of intensity as they rap out the almost-world premiere of Guido's folk classic, "Second Coming of Bacchus." Photo by Robin Garr

Ok, most of you that went to MO'COOL heard me play this tune (twice on Saturday and once on Sunday) that I wrote about RMP. I was asked to post the lyrics, so here goes. Strictly tongue in cheek, so I hope it does not offend those of you that rated him so highly in Robin's voting booth a few months back. This excerpt includes both the lyrics and some rough chord notations - a recorded version should show up somewhere (Gang of Pour and MO'COOL sites) as soon as I can get it done.

Verse: Bm A Bm A Bm D A Bm G A Bm A
He is the Second Coming of Bacchus
The premier critic that walks among us
Robert Parker is the name
Scoring wine is his game
He is the Second Coming of Bacchus

He likes ‘em thick & dark & brooding
Tannin and oak should be protruding
The nose should jump from the glass
Size wins out over class
He is the Second Coming of Bacchus

Bridge: Dm C Bb A Dm C Bb A A7
He can make or break a vineyard with a single review
It’s gotten to the point where he tells them what to do

He prefers a style that international
I think that this is quite irrational
Where it’s from doesn’t matter much
Jammy fruit and oak are the magic touch
He is the Second Coming of Bacchus

Then there is the matter of extraction
This always gets a huge reaction
Overripe, rich & fat
He doesn’t think acid’s where it’s at
He is the Second Coming of Bacchus

Repeat Bridge:

I must admit he is consistent
He loves that alcohol and glycerin
Subtlety will never win
Elegant means it’s “a little too thin”
He is the Second Coming of Bacchus

He is the Second Coming of Bacchus
The premier critic that walks among us
Robert Parker is the name
Bigger is better is his claim
He is the Second Coming of Bacchus